Tough choice

I had to make a tough choice this afternoon. Jack sent me a text/email telling me that he was on IM and could I meet him online. I really, really wanted to, but I was at work and already had a committment that takes priority over everything else. So, I had to tell Jack that I was sorry, but I was unable to chat today. It killed me, but even though he is away, my life has to go on and I need my job to keep me busy. I did however, tell the person I had the committment with that my husband was deployed and if he calls, I am taking the call...regardless if it is against the rules or not. She understood.
I hate having to make tough decisions like these.

Toughest time

So far, I have been really feeling good about this deployment. I have had my moments of "a year is a fucking long time" but I have a journal I keep by my side to right in and those moments pass. Many people say that the toughest time of day for them during a deployment is at nighttime. Of course, I have to be different and the nights are not bothering me so much. I have accepted that Jack will not be home at night and I move on. It means I can play online or watch whatever I want on TV. The toughest time for me is between the hours of 7am and 3pm. Why? Because of the time difference, I know that Jack is awake during those times and I wait for a text, email, call or IM from him. (By waiting, I don't mean that I am sitting doing nothing. I mean that everytime my cell phone goes off, I grab it because it might be him.) Once 3pm hits, I know that the chances of him calling me are slim because he is getting ready to go to sleep for the night. Thankfully, I am working between those hours (or getting ready for work) so I can stay busy.